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WWE Slammy Awards

December 13, 2011 by · Comments Off on WWE Slammy Awards 

WWE Slammy Awards, The entire show was gimmicked to work around the awards, which resulted in three mostly wasted hours with little wrestling and a lot of talking mixed with video packages.

Let’s get to some reactions from the show:

The first hour of a three hour broadcast is a throwaway, which is why we ended up with Jim Ross and Michael Cole in a “rap off” spurned on by Booker T, because, you know, that’s what he likes. The segment was funny in a sad way but quickly became uncomfortably bad when Ross forgot his lines and made that horrible attempt at a spin-a-rooni. The idea wasn’t so bad but the execution was god awful.

What was the point of having Big Show vs. Wade Barrett? The match lasted all of a minute and a half and it resulted in a bullsh*t disqualification that didn’t help anyone and didn’t sell the pay-per-view they’re supposed to be building towards this Sunday night. The idea behind it was fine, with Barrett giving the proper set up beforehand, but playing the match out that way was just a waste of time.

The fans at the Scope last night couldn’t have cared any less about the Road Dogg Jesse James. That did two things to me. 1. I felt sad that these people couldn’t be bothered to participate in one of the easiest mark entrance songs ever and 2. I felt really old, despite still being relatively young. The sad fact? That crowd probably didn’t know who Road Dogg is or ever was.

CM Punk was stumbling over his lines tonight but no one seemed to notice or care. Not that I do, but he seemed off for some reason. Could be the silly segment he did with a blow up doll. The references to the Dynamic Dudes need to stop, too. If the crowd doesn’t know who Road Dogg is, they sure as hell aren’t going to know anything about any Dynamic Dude. Plus, it’s grown tired. Find some new material, please.

The Bella Twins dresses? Win. Pure win.

Triple H returning to almost no reaction wasn’t much of a shock. What was more shocking to me was his near total and complete inability to make me care in any way, shape or form about his match against Kevin Nash on Sunday. I might dump on “The Game” for being a ruthless political player but he’s usually money on the microphone and he’s still solid in the ring. Last night, he cut a really vanilla promo that made me wish the program was already over. That ladder match is going to be a disaster of epic proportions.
Thoughts on the rest of the show after the jump.

The idea behind awarding a Slammy to whoever trended during a match is quite possibly the stupidest thing anyone has ever done in pro wrestling. That said, I really enjoyed Cody Rhodes and Dolph Ziggler working together. Daniel Bryan was great too but Zack Ryder’s presence brought the match down a notch. He’s got a good following but he can’t keep up with a lot of these guys.

Christian was awesome in the short time he got to be on TV. This injury will turn out to be a good thing for him, as his character was growing stale and his story repetitive. Yeah, he mostly pushed the same lines last night but he did so with a vigor we weren’t getting before. Let’s hope that’s the guy who returns when he’s healthy.

I really don’t like how Randy Orton is being made to look like such a dork each week with these silly little distractions from Barrett that are costing him matches. This time Orton wasn’t counted out and made to look like a complete donk, he just cost CM Punk a match. I understand that Barrett should be the guy looking the strongest going into the pay-per-view but he doesn’t look strong with these small run-ins and they make Orton look bad. That’s bad booking, you guys.

Sheamus vs. Jinder Mahal was a classic example of “make sure this guy gets on television, no matter what has to be done, even a silly squash that no one will understand the reasons behind because none are needed, because this guy just needs to get one TV.” What sucks is I feel like I’m the only one on Earth who thinks Mahal could be a strong heel if they just gave him a big enough push. Anyone else think that or am I totally alone?
The Cena vs. Mark Henry match was actually okay before Kane came out to wreck shop. I don’t get why he chokeslammed Cena, other than the fact that he’s a monster again, but I loved the look on Henry’s face when he realized it was Kane and bailed out. It’s small things like that that make me mark out for Henry.

Kane’s new look is awesome.

I won’t judge this show too harshly because, again, they simply worked everything around the Slammy Awards. As a go-home show to a pay-per-view, it was terrible but it was hard not to mark out when Kane made his return. The three hours before it get a D but the “Big Red Monster Machine” returning gets an A+ from me. Love the new look.

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