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Seventeen

September 12, 2010 by USA Post 

Seventeen, I was seventeen on September 11, 2001. I remember sitting in guitar class. From the guitar in reality, although he had been playing since I was seven. It was an easy class.

So everyone was in class, fck watching television when the court after a plane crashed into the twin towers. I thought, well, that the pilot sucks. If I’ll be honest here. I thought, wow we are the only people who are stupid enough to crash planes into our own buildings. Of course, after the second plane hit I knew it was on purpose. Then I felt terrible.

I could not imagine how far they would fall over the next eight years.

I’ve always been interested in politics and history, since childhood. Issues like war and racism and civil rights have always been important to me. I remember when I was a kid arguing with my mom when she would use the “n” word, or make some stupid comment “blow ‘em all” or something. What made it a lot. All my family, really.

He had been mostly interested in political history, however, and I had not closely followed current events anymore. I was dealing with a lot of personal issues at the time, fresh frozen within two years, and was very depressed. I continued with what I could, but not much.

I knew it was worse than I thought as the assistant principal has over the PA system and said: “A second plane has reached the second tower of the World Trade Center. We are at war.”

My first thought was, the war? The war, are you serious? This had happened just four seconds of sht and we’re wanting revenge through a bloody and painful war? We’re under the assumption that we will go kick some ass, we will not resolve this in a rational way, just blow ‘em up and let out kind of God’ em? What are we doing? What are we thinking?

He knew that the death toll of thousands would watch the news after a few minutes. I knew we were about to lose so many people and I assumed that the economy would have great success too. We had to rebuild. We needed to do search and rescue and cleaning and making sure that people are good. And all we can talk about is the war?

After my first thought passed, I wondered, war with whom? I knew there were having big problems with any specific country at the moment. I could not understand that they were going to war. They did not know who did it. Some of my teachers threw around the name of Osama bin Laden, but at the time no one knew. It just happened a few minutes ago. Was it really bothers me that within minutes my school and keep the news about this “war” with somebody somewhere in an indeterminate amount of time. I was freaked out actually. I was afraid we were put in danger by starting this war with anyone. It scares me MOST people would die unnecessarily.

I watched the people jumping out of windows. I remember more clearly than anything else that day. Women and men, fathers and mothers. They just got scared. They saw no other way out so just jump to his death. It’s really strange how people react in panic situations. I can not say I was not going to give that up, but it bothered me a lot to do people do it. People were terrified and trapped … could not know whether he had ever leave, if they had burns or choking to death, or being trapped under the rubble. So minutes after hearing that we are at war with anyone, I feel and see how people in my country go to his death on television. I thought, I know that some of them? Do you know anyone in New York? It turns out that a boy and knew he was right.

Just wanted to vomit, you know? Why would anyone here ever forced to jump to the death of a burning building? What the hell took us to this point? I could not see more people jumping. It made me sick. I did not want more people to die. I just wanted everything to stop. I wanted to stop and help people only. Should not we be focusing on that, I thought.

And then a thought struck me like a fcking flash: what is wrong with our president, our media, and even ordinary people here in southern Alabama, which would see all this happen and just want more death and more revenge and more bombs exploding? What’s wrong here? I began to see that day and the weeks following that our nation has some serious problems.

‘Dead or’ Alive, ‘Bring’ Em On! ‘And all this, who would say these things? What kind of president would see his country is attacked and get an erection to send his army to die in some ways more cruel and inhuman? And then they started talking about the idea of “preventive war.” Fighting them first to root out. And then fighting them there so we do not have to fight them here.

Fighting fighting fighting, war and war and some more war.

I mean, I got the message. Bush is a cowboy and a resilient people are arrogant and do not take sht and other things.

We’ll put a boot in your ass, it’s the American way.

I understand that.

I honestly can not see how they would jump from a terrorist attack that. So, how? All my friends were very diverse. Do not hang out with people who all thought the same way. I can not do that mentally. Therefore, everyone had different opinions, but each and every one of them thought we should be helping people on that day. Everyone was watching the firefighters and police and rescue workers in the fear of complete sht. We wanted to embrace everyone and tell them they are appreciated more than you could possibly imagine. Even my Republican friends want that! Nobody wanted to go directly to more than Somewhereistan, Middle East and dropping bombs. So why our government and our media want so much?

Definitely learned a lot from that time, and most of it left me sick for the next eight years.

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